Should She Stay or Go?

When it comes to the challenges of life with kids, who understands what we’re going through better than other moms and dads? In FITL’s Parent Talk, we’re sharing questions and dilemmas that we receive directly from you, our readers. We encourage you to add your thoughts, reactions, and advice in the comments section below. Have you been through something similar, and how did it impact you and your family? We’ve got only one rule in this section, and that is to choose your words wisely. No meanies, please!

Question: Should I Stay or Go?

I’ve been married for almost ten years and have a son who’s almost five. My husband is extremely controlling and I’ve been unhappy in our marriage for a long time.  Last year, I tried to finally leave him, but he cut off all access to our money and I was broke (I don’t work). It was hard to go back to him but I decided to do it, since I don’t want to change my lifestyle and I think it’s probably best for our child to live with both parents. I still often worry that I’ve made the wrong choice, but I don’t know what to do anymore. Any advice?

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One Response to “Should She Stay or Go?”

  1. On June 5, 2012 at 6:41 am Jess responded with... #

    You absolutely need to go. Think about the message that your son is receiving by seeing the way his dad treats you. He is learning that it is ok to be controlling, to treat others with a lack of respect, and he is seeing that you don’t value yourself enough to take a stand and demand better treatment (in whatever way you need to). It is tough and scary going out on your own, but you need to look at both sides of the coin, is your happiness, mental health, self esteem, well being… worth giving up? I know it is hard to give up a lifestyle that you have become accustomed to, but you will find a new life and hopefully one that is better for all of you. There are times when having both parents living/staying together is not best for your child, and I think that this is one of those times. I wish you luck with whatever decision you choose to make.

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